A Dogs life?
Seriously what is the problem? I mean, there I am happily running about the fields in hot pursuit of a ball or an intriguing smell when all of sudden everything is an issue. I bark, he shouts I jump and run off and he calls me back. We’ve not been gone from the house for 5 minutes I’m sure of it.
Yeah so, I’m a bit wet but rolling in the grass feels So good as I’ve been a bit itchy of late. It’s not a problem as such but it’s been getting annoying to be fair. Still wet dog, no problem there I’ll just give myself a massive shake and that’s job done. Oh, hang on. He’s shouting again, Man you’d think he’d be a bit happier.
Still, my leads on now so off we go home. I’m not that sorry if I was honest. I’m starting to feel a bit peckish and that itching is starting to come back again. Watch this, this always freaks old two legs out. Bum down, leg in air and scratch, scratch, scratch. He’s not happy with that either, actually that’s made it a bit worse thinking about it. I’d do that 3-legged scratch under me tummy thing that makes it look like I’m about to topple over any minute. Ahh that’s better. Having said that I’m not so sure, it’s itchy elsewhere. This is becoming maddening now. How can I make it stop the scratchings not really working? I know a quick bark might do the trick, I may even throw in a whimper for good measure.
Oh, see that’s it. Now I’ve got his attention. Nice little strokes and a bit of loving a care. Yeah, it’s this itch mate can you do something about it? Nice steak would do I should think. That’ll take my mind off it. Still were home now, better get the dinner on. What’s this? No dinner? He’s pointing upstairs, it’s not bed time is it, not that I’m allowed on the bed of course. Snigger. He’s like waving a bottle at me, why can I hear running water. What a minute I know what’s going on here! He’s going to get me in that flippin’ bath! That is not happen. I don’t care about the bubbles mate I’m not getting in that thing no way. Damn this itching! Right I’m off to hide under the sofa or his bed that I’m supposedly banned from.
Really, really itchy now. Will that bath make me feel better? D’you reckon? Perhaps I should get in. Of I go let’s take the plunge. Oh you know what this is alright. Feels a lot better. Right quick jump out and a massive shake off. Oh dear, he’s shouting again. Never happy some people.